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The choice is yours: Stop doing things you don't actually want to do - The Baylor Lariat

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By Kourtney David | Copy Editor

I’m about to let you in on the biggest secret to getting through all the big and little tasks, meetings and applications that you’re dreading. I promise this tip will come in handy at your next mundane sorority event or when the impending doom of attending more college makes you want to forget you ever started the process. This is my go-to tool for surviving when you’re overextended and bored with your duties. Are you sure you’re ready for it?

Here’s my one-step solution: Stop choosing to do things you don’t want to or don’t have time for (especially if you’re paying thousands of dollars for them).

Every day, I hear members of Greek life complaining about going to workshops, doing the bare minimum volunteer hours or not being allowed to post like a normal person on social media, as if they don’t have the choice to not be a part of the organization. Being a part of a group is fun, but when your affiliations bring more negativity into your life than benefit, it’s time to cut the cord. What drew you to the group in the first place, and have you lost sight of that?

If you feel like you’re overextended and all the things you’re required to do are interfering with your schoolwork, health or job, then maybe your plan of doing all the things just isn’t working out for you anymore. Maybe asking to be excused from (or simply skipping) every event that isn’t “fun” isn’t the right way to go about being a member. Reassess and find out what’s really important. I promise no one will be mad at you for doing the right thing for you. If they are, they only cared about what you were able to do for them in the first place.

The same goes for college seniors who seem to be forced into doing more school after graduation for a better paycheck. I’ve been so busy doing what I’m supposed to do in college that I don’t even know what I want to do anymore outside the classroom, and I need time to figure that out. However, no matter who you talk to, the answer is always the same when you say you need a break from school or want more time to decide what your actual interests are.

“You’ll never actually go back to school.” Yeah, I certainly won’t if that’s the attitude everyone has about it. And further, what if I find out that I have an actual interest in something or that I can find a job without going through more school? It sounds like I just saved thousands of dollars by not doing something I’m not even sure I want to do.

Are you afraid that all your sorority sisters, family members or coworkers will stop caring about you if you make a decision to stop doing whatever is making you unhappy? First of all, if you have to question your relationship in this context, you should probably reevaluate the sincerity of your connections. Second, the people who actually love you or want to be your friend will be there, even if that speck on your resume isn’t.

This isn’t a get-out-of-jail-free card, either. If you’ve made an obligation to do a job or complete something, you can’t just decide you don’t want to and quit. However, if something isn’t bringing you joy anymore, you have to admit that fact to yourself and develop your plan to either salvage the hope you have left or exit the position. Otherwise you’re just causing yourself a lot of undue stress and probably debt.

It’s alright to want to experience life outside of being a student or a member. It’s alright to outgrow boxes that aren’t meant for you or to change your perspective. The fear of missing out will wear off eventually, I promise.

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The choice is yours: Stop doing things you don't actually want to do - The Baylor Lariat
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